Stanford Details

I went to Stanford on June 25th to get a second opinion about radiation. My doc here thought I might not need it. My treatment plan has been less than traditional and that has made it a little harder to make decisions on the next course of action. So, Stanford doc recommends radiation. There were many factors to consider. I had a chemo treatment before I had surgery. My lymph nodes were clear at the time of surgery but the chemo might have done that, there were some indicators saying that my lymph nodes may have actually had some cancerous activity. But it is impossible to tell now. Another things to consider are my age, that was a really big one when considering the occurrence statistics. My cancer was also poorly differentiated. Meaning my cancer cells were highly mutated when compared to my other cells. That's not good. However my HER2 was negative, that's good. So, after weighing all of the factors, radiation it is. I was prepared to take whatever opinion the Stanford doc gave. She only does radiation for breast cancer, I researched her and think she is one of the best in the world! This is what she has devoted her life to do! I loved how much information she gave me, how willing she was to answer any questions, the time she devoted to my case, and she talked with Heidi and my Dad too! Her resident was thorough and she took time to really feel for my lymph nodes. She gave me more information that anyone else has and I think I have gotten a lot of good information. I loved it! I feel good knowing that I am making a really good decision for me and my situation. People are asking why I even went for a second opinion and not just do radiation. It's really not that simple though. Clearly radiation can be dangerous in some situations and over treating cancer can be just as dangerous as under treating it. The decisions my team and I are making are a little different than many breast cancer cases because of my age. 40 and under is rare and a lot of studies don't include my age group at all. There are a lot of studies on survivors 10 years out, but not 40, and I would really like to make it at least that long.

Stanford Update

Ok, I have my appointment for Stanford and I got to talk to a resident and understand what is happening a lot more now. I feel really good about it. The doctors want a second opinion. So basically with my situation, chemo and a mastectomy with clear lymph-nodes, they would not do radiation. But because I had numerous pockets of different cancers throughout the breast, radiation should be considered. There are side effects from radiation that make this decision some thing to take seriously. I am very happy that my doctors are comfortable saying they do not have all the answers and I am happy they are sending me to such an excellent doctor for my second opinion.

oh how things can change

My radiation oncologist just called. He wants a second opinion and is sending me to Stanford. I appreciate his honesty and admitting he does not have all the answers. I think that is a really good quality in a doctor. His concern is that I might not need radiation. If I do not need it, I do not want it, however, I think I need it. My opinion is formed mostly from my fears though and I want to be more aggressive than not. He thinks I am borderline, so I say lets go! The side effects of radiation might not be worth it and that is when the medical second opinion comes in. Radiation can only be given once per area, ever. So, if I don't need it now, and get it I have wasted my only shot at radiation. However, if I don;t get radiation and have a recurrence, then I will always think that I should have had it. Also, this pushes back my return to work! Again! So I think I might just go back now. Maybe work 4 days a week, and have one day of disability a week. 3 days of work in a week is not worth it financially although might be perfect for me physically and emotionally. hmmmm.... so many decisions..... I am sure I will come up with something soon, I'll keep you posted.
And, Stanford scares me, I think it makes it more real and more serious, when up till now, I have just been cruising along, excluding the 3 surgeries to get it all.

Radiation Consultation

Hi all, I haven't been writing much because not much has been happening in the cancer world, until today. I went for my Radiation consultation and it took soooooo long! I was there for almost 2 hours!!! And when I got there, about 10 min before my appointment, they said oh we have been waiting for you.... hmmmmm.... I think that is a little weird. The guy comes and gets me and goes over all the things in my chart, makes a few updates and tells me doc will be right in. It seems like forever, 45 min or so, and he comes back to say doc is in Hanford! Geeze! Ok, I can only wait another 45 min, I had another appointment and I really need to be on time for that. SO we get as much done as we can with no doc, which was really quit a bit considering! :) My next appointment goes great and I was able to make it on time! Very happy about that!
SO radiation will start on Monday! I will have another appointment this week to go threw the steps once, line the machine up, make a few tattoos on my body, ya know the good stuff. I will give updates when I know more, I will go everyday once I start and I will not be radioactive!!!!

No More Chemo

I had the best day yesterday! First of all, it was the first day of being officially off of chemo. Heidi and I enjoyed some light rafting (in a pool), Heidi got rockstar put on her toes, while I got a wig trim! Sooooo fun! I didn't think I would be sitting in a salon chair for a long long time!!!! Lunch was my fav chicken sandwich right now, yummy, then home for a nap. I was exhausted!!! After the nap I decorated cup cakes, fun! Got ready and before I knew it, the party was in full swing! So Everytime to door opens I look over to see who is coming in, I see a group of people walk in and in the back of the group was my step-sister! I about fell over! I said hi to the group as fast as possible so i could get to Kari. We haven't seen each other in about 18 years! Yes years!!! Our parents were married for almost 10 years, from the time I was 6 - 16, so I really grew up with her! I cried and just couldn't even believe she was standing in my house!!!! I loved it! my little sister set it all up and surprised me so much! I usually figure out surprises, but this one really really surprised!!! I loved it, we had the best time, Kari and her husband Ron were so much fun! We are going to stay in touch now and hopefully get together soon!
In other party news, I was really happy with how many people came by to hang out and say hi! I had the best time! Friends I haven't seen since high school came, co workers came, old roommates, college friends, parents of friends, my parents, so many people! People came and went until midnight! I absolutely loved the entire night!!!! It was the best party I have been to in so long!!!! I am still smiling thinking about all the fun! Thank you everyone was able to come! And those of you that weren't able to come and want to still get together we will soon! Love you all!!!

countdown to the end of chemo

I have just a few more days of chemo left in me and plan to celebrate the second I am off of it! So come to my house on Tuesday May 26th at 7:00 pm and enjoy some chemolicious cake and cocktails! E-mail me and let me know you are stopping by so I make sure there is enough cake!

last few days of chemo

In just a little over a week I will be done with all of this! I can't wait! I have nothing else nice to say right now, so I will leave this post short. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel but can't loose focus on breathing, not puking, and staying comfortable long enough to appreciate it right now. But in a few days I will and I am really looking forward to it! I know people are excited for me and keep counting down the days, I really appreciate it, but I have to keep my thoughts where they are right now. We can all celebrate at the No More Chemo Party, May 26th, 7:00 pm, let me know if you are coming, everyone is invited!