Over the radiation hump!

I have completed 19 radiation treatments and have 14 more to go! I am burnt, itchy, tired, and moody. Sometimes I am so cranky I could do vicious harm to people, and other times I am laughing and joking like my regular self. So, you have been warned, I do not know when and where these moods will change, but I do try to just leave and not inflict my crazy moods on the people around me. I am excited that the end is getting closer, not cartwheel excited. The worst is yet to come so I am bracing myself and hoping for the best.
Ok,my hair is growing back nice and thick, and maybe even less gray, please do not let me be jinxed for saying that! I put a little product in it and it looks messy and kind of cute. I am happy with it, however it seems to be so bittersweet to me because of, in my opinion, the ridiculous behavior it brings out. People ask me if I love it, tell me about dreams they had of me with my long hair flowing in the wind, and some attack me rubbing roughly while drawling an annoying hooooowwwwww cuuuuuuute or oh my gosh, no one else could pull that off! really people? I think you mean well, I am sure you do, ok, I really hope you do. But these comments are killing me! Maybe that's why I want to do harm.... I am not sure what I would do to my friends if I was on the other side. However, I think it is like a pregnant belly, ask before you touch and NEVER, EVER, and I mean EVER mention how tiny they were just a few months ago. So applying the same philosophy would be ask if you want to rub or lick (yeah that was a fun one), and do not ever ever ever bring up my long beautiful hair that you never realized had so much gray. If you apply this logic when approaching me I promise not to punch you in the nose, kind of like a twisted game of tit for tat. When people say they want to touch it, I almost always let them, I even point out the softest spots, really it has never been softer, but it is new baby hair, you would never rub a babies head that hard! It is delicate and please do make even one strand fall out!
The other thing on my mind, if you are still reading after my hair rules tirade, is the under 40 cancer survivor. There are so many issues related to this age group. I am learning new things ever day! Did you know that our survival statistics have not improved since 1970?!?!?! OMG!!! We are the least represented in studies, are more likely to be diagnosed at stage III and IV, have an average annual income of $35,00, are the least insured group, and so many other terrible things! I love reading and learning more, but I am afraid to keep reading. Who knows what I will find!
If you are reading this as a note on facebook, please take a look at my blog page, I have links to other sites with cool info and pretty charts and graphs.... we are still a tin foil society right? http://janicebardone.blogspot.com/